Your humble narrator is the unofficial Midwest distributor of the new presidential dollar coins. Whether I get them from the bank or as change from the USPS stamp machines, I always try to keep a dozen or so in my pocket to spread around.
Reaction varies as, at this writing, the coins have been around since earlier in the year and three presidents are now in circulation. Some assume it's the Sacagawea coin, others are just impressed with how shiny they are, while a few actually ask, "Are these real?"
A couple of my favorite dollar-coin stories go like this:
At a McDonald's, my tab came to exactly $1.50. I gave the counter person two "gold" coins.
"What are these," he asked.
"The new dollar coins," I replied.
"Cool," he responded as he tried to decide which part of the cash drawer to put them in. (Most cash drawers have an extra slot after the quarters for keys and/or unusual coins.)
"Just don't put them in your quarter slot and you'll be okay," I remarked.
"Ronald Jr." gave me a "Duh!" look, then gave me my change - the two presidential coins I'd just given him, which he had indeed dropped into the quarter slot. Quickly assessing that the young man was beyond training in the fine art of coin handling during my limited time, and reminding myself of an Illinois judge's comment - "You can't fix stupid." - I pocketed the coins, took my order, thanked the young man and departed.
The other story comes from a Target store, where another young man was at the register where I paid with five shiny dollar coins.
I believe he had over-moussed that morning, as he seemed very confused by what I had given him. He didn't ask what they were or give any of the usual reactions. Instead, he just began looking around, apparently for some sort of guidance.
He didn't ASK for guidance, he just LOOKED for it. When he finally caught the eye of a young manager, he asked "What should I do with these?" not even holding up the coins, but apparently believing the manager had telepathic abilities.
She reponded with a glance that the popular snooty high school girls give the unpopular boys who dare to enter their aura of popularity, so Mr. Target was on his own. He looked around a bit more, again seeking that mysterious guidance one hopes to obtain by just projecting hopelessness, but he received no reaction.
Finally, in mild frustration, he put the coins under the coin slots (where checks and "big bills" are sometimes kept), gave me my correct change, and then turned his glassy gaze back to his register.
For reactions alone, the new coins are a lot of fun. Some folk will actually express joy in receiving them, as they see them as a gift for a child or as a collectible. At the Chicago Museum of Art, the cafeteria checker refused them, saying it was "policy" not to accept them as she had no place to put them in her cash drawer. (Yours truly saw her as beyond hope, too, and didn't bother to show her that next-to-the-quarters slot; maybe they store a small Picasso there or something.)
Anyway, the presidential dollar coins are out there, and a new one comes out every three months. They make nice Christmas gifts. Will they suffer the same fate as the Susan B. Anthonys and the Sacageweas? That remains to be seen. The government would like them to become popular, as they last longer than the $1 bill. But I believe, like Canada, they will have to do away with the bill if they want the coin to stay.
In the meantime, I'll keep spreading them - along with joy, confusion and enlightenment - around the Midwest.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Rebarbative Jackanapes
Call me a rebarbative jackanapes - if you can! - but your humble narrator has finally found the time to gnaw on a couple of those proverbial bones. (I'm trying to be calmer ... but it's hard to calm the storm, baby!)
Item: The female summer fashion statement of flip-flops and high-waters as acceptable office attire.
First, I don't care how much you paid for them, they're shower shoes. Doesn't matter if they're made of faux leather and have rhinestones. And I really don't care whose name was on the box. They're noisy, they're bad for your feet, and they're potentially dangerous. And did I mention they're noisy?!
But if you MUST, you must, so why not make sure even the DEAF know you are wearing shower shoes by exposing your ankles and calves - Oh! Look who's got a new tattoo! - in a nice pair of high-waters. (Remember that term from high school? You were growing faster than your pant legs and kids would tease you with, "Where's the flood?")
About the only person I can think who ever looked good in them - and she's the only one in my opinion who could call them "Capris" as she'd probably been there (the Isle of Capri, that is) was Audrey Hepburn. And I'm talking young, "Breakfast at Tiffany's" Audrey Hepburn.
Everybody else? You look like you're goin' to a picnic and you're so CHEAP, you volunteered to bring NAPKINS!
Item: Waitresses calling me "hon" and "sweetie."
Now yours truly eats out a lot, and he enjoys good service. He actually studies it: he learned recently that "Do you need any change?" is not always a cheap we to fish for a tip - on the contrary, it's considered rude to make change at the table and if you don't need change, you save your server and yourself time.
But who started this "hon/sweetie" thing? I don't even know you! I've gotten this unsolicited familiarity from waitresses of all ages ... is it passed down by the generations that have come before? Is it like the first commandment of waitressing: Thou Shalt Call the Customer "Hon" or "Sweetie"?!
I don't like it. I don't get it. But I feel a LOT BETTER for pounding it out!!!
Item: The female summer fashion statement of flip-flops and high-waters as acceptable office attire.
First, I don't care how much you paid for them, they're shower shoes. Doesn't matter if they're made of faux leather and have rhinestones. And I really don't care whose name was on the box. They're noisy, they're bad for your feet, and they're potentially dangerous. And did I mention they're noisy?!
But if you MUST, you must, so why not make sure even the DEAF know you are wearing shower shoes by exposing your ankles and calves - Oh! Look who's got a new tattoo! - in a nice pair of high-waters. (Remember that term from high school? You were growing faster than your pant legs and kids would tease you with, "Where's the flood?")
About the only person I can think who ever looked good in them - and she's the only one in my opinion who could call them "Capris" as she'd probably been there (the Isle of Capri, that is) was Audrey Hepburn. And I'm talking young, "Breakfast at Tiffany's" Audrey Hepburn.
Everybody else? You look like you're goin' to a picnic and you're so CHEAP, you volunteered to bring NAPKINS!
Item: Waitresses calling me "hon" and "sweetie."
Now yours truly eats out a lot, and he enjoys good service. He actually studies it: he learned recently that "Do you need any change?" is not always a cheap we to fish for a tip - on the contrary, it's considered rude to make change at the table and if you don't need change, you save your server and yourself time.
But who started this "hon/sweetie" thing? I don't even know you! I've gotten this unsolicited familiarity from waitresses of all ages ... is it passed down by the generations that have come before? Is it like the first commandment of waitressing: Thou Shalt Call the Customer "Hon" or "Sweetie"?!
I don't like it. I don't get it. But I feel a LOT BETTER for pounding it out!!!
Sunday, January 07, 2007
The Lucky Charms
I've been charmed.
I chanced upon The Lucky Charms at O'Malley's Pub in Weston when a few friends gathered in the underground venue to celebrate my niece Jessie's birthday. I've seen them twice since, and have at least two future dates inked to date.
Go to www.theluckycharms.com and, because they are nice folk, you can listen to some of their music free. Or you can buy their debut CD, which I'll review for you now.
The Lucky Charms is a nice sampling of what this band from the greater Kansas City area does best: harmony, nice playing, and fun - all with a bit o' the Irish mixed in to spice it up.
Although five of the 11 cuts are termed "traditional," The Lucky Charms make them their own, such as "Nancy Whiskey," in which they nicely blend a bit of the standard "Heart and Soul." It's a catchy tune, about drinking of course, and I find myself humming it several times a day.
But the one that comes to me the most is Dominic Behan's "Black & Tans." It's a rousing song with definite Irish roots. It stands alone, but if you take the time to Google or Wikapedia the demons who carried that nickname, you'll get a definite appreciation for why it's one The Lucky Charms really belt out. And they "charm" it a bit, too - slipping in someof The Ramones "What I Like About You."
As you can learn on their website, The Lucky Charms is made up of three ladies and a gentleman. Christine "Cricket" Pugh is the original member; she plays guitar, flute and tin whistle. Alaina Romine plays guitar and bass. Dori Walker Como plays the Irish drum. Gerry Monks plays guitar and mandolin.
And they all sing ... very well. The harmony of the three women is a real treat - check out "The Skye Boat Song" on the website as a good example. And aside from his excellent playing, Gerry comes through very strong on his two original songs on the CD, "The New World," a upbeat song that can stir the heart of anyone who can trace their family tree to the Emerald Isle, and "One Last Jar" (again, about drinking) which is my second favorite song on the CD (next to "Black & Tans.")
The Lucky Charms is an outstanding first effort for the group. But if you want to fully appreciate it, you're going to have to come hear them perform so you can be charmed as well.
Having both packed-house and snow-restricted shows to compare, I can testify that they are great fun. They'll mix songs from the CD with a wide variety of American folk, Celtic tunes, and covers, ranging from Janis Joplin to Richard Thompson. If Cricket doesn't have the song in her head or her Big Book, she'll do it best to have it ready when you come back for another show ... and you will come back.
The Lucky Charms both entertain and involve their audiences, giving little assignments that range from singing a bit to drinking a bit to spewing a bit of mild profanity - all in fun, of course. And even if she doesn't bring along her dancing shoes, make sure to get Dori to lead you through "The Unicorn Song."
Here's wishing The Lucky Charms good luck with their CD! Best wishes for many more!
I chanced upon The Lucky Charms at O'Malley's Pub in Weston when a few friends gathered in the underground venue to celebrate my niece Jessie's birthday. I've seen them twice since, and have at least two future dates inked to date.
Go to www.theluckycharms.com and, because they are nice folk, you can listen to some of their music free. Or you can buy their debut CD, which I'll review for you now.
The Lucky Charms is a nice sampling of what this band from the greater Kansas City area does best: harmony, nice playing, and fun - all with a bit o' the Irish mixed in to spice it up.
Although five of the 11 cuts are termed "traditional," The Lucky Charms make them their own, such as "Nancy Whiskey," in which they nicely blend a bit of the standard "Heart and Soul." It's a catchy tune, about drinking of course, and I find myself humming it several times a day.
But the one that comes to me the most is Dominic Behan's "Black & Tans." It's a rousing song with definite Irish roots. It stands alone, but if you take the time to Google or Wikapedia the demons who carried that nickname, you'll get a definite appreciation for why it's one The Lucky Charms really belt out. And they "charm" it a bit, too - slipping in someof The Ramones "What I Like About You."
As you can learn on their website, The Lucky Charms is made up of three ladies and a gentleman. Christine "Cricket" Pugh is the original member; she plays guitar, flute and tin whistle. Alaina Romine plays guitar and bass. Dori Walker Como plays the Irish drum. Gerry Monks plays guitar and mandolin.
And they all sing ... very well. The harmony of the three women is a real treat - check out "The Skye Boat Song" on the website as a good example. And aside from his excellent playing, Gerry comes through very strong on his two original songs on the CD, "The New World," a upbeat song that can stir the heart of anyone who can trace their family tree to the Emerald Isle, and "One Last Jar" (again, about drinking) which is my second favorite song on the CD (next to "Black & Tans.")
The Lucky Charms is an outstanding first effort for the group. But if you want to fully appreciate it, you're going to have to come hear them perform so you can be charmed as well.
Having both packed-house and snow-restricted shows to compare, I can testify that they are great fun. They'll mix songs from the CD with a wide variety of American folk, Celtic tunes, and covers, ranging from Janis Joplin to Richard Thompson. If Cricket doesn't have the song in her head or her Big Book, she'll do it best to have it ready when you come back for another show ... and you will come back.
The Lucky Charms both entertain and involve their audiences, giving little assignments that range from singing a bit to drinking a bit to spewing a bit of mild profanity - all in fun, of course. And even if she doesn't bring along her dancing shoes, make sure to get Dori to lead you through "The Unicorn Song."
Here's wishing The Lucky Charms good luck with their CD! Best wishes for many more!
Mouton Gregarious
All I wanted for Christmas was Gisele Bundchen (with the double-dot umlaut over the u).
Not the Brazilian born super model herself, but her Amazon-size cardboard cut out that was hanging in the window of Victoria's Secret at the local mall. She was dressed in a little pink outfit, complete with a Santa hat, and was looking quite saucy.
I have to confess I wasn't sure what I would do with Gisele once I got her, but Big M, my morning mall walking partner, suggested suspending her above my bed. It was enjoyable to just think about the possibilities.
What I actually GOT for Christmas was Mouton Gregarious (emphasis on the "-ton," sounding as in "John.) Factually, I didn't really "get" Mouton - she is not my property. She is more like something I have checked out from the Library of Life and she's in charge of the due date.
Words can't really describe her ... at least words at the moment in the public library where I have a gamer on my left and a speed-scroller on my right (I don't think these people USE the keyboard!) I can certainly do a "let me count the ways" exercise, however.
First, she has a dazzling smile - a full face smile made all the more dazzling by her sparkling eyes.
Second, she's sharp ... very intelligent.
Third, she's "a hoot."
Fourth, she is fun to be with, a joy to be with, an honor to be with.
And fifth, she introduces me to some of the many people she knows as "my boyfriend."
I hope that means her return date isn't anytime soon! :)
Not the Brazilian born super model herself, but her Amazon-size cardboard cut out that was hanging in the window of Victoria's Secret at the local mall. She was dressed in a little pink outfit, complete with a Santa hat, and was looking quite saucy.
I have to confess I wasn't sure what I would do with Gisele once I got her, but Big M, my morning mall walking partner, suggested suspending her above my bed. It was enjoyable to just think about the possibilities.
What I actually GOT for Christmas was Mouton Gregarious (emphasis on the "-ton," sounding as in "John.) Factually, I didn't really "get" Mouton - she is not my property. She is more like something I have checked out from the Library of Life and she's in charge of the due date.
Words can't really describe her ... at least words at the moment in the public library where I have a gamer on my left and a speed-scroller on my right (I don't think these people USE the keyboard!) I can certainly do a "let me count the ways" exercise, however.
First, she has a dazzling smile - a full face smile made all the more dazzling by her sparkling eyes.
Second, she's sharp ... very intelligent.
Third, she's "a hoot."
Fourth, she is fun to be with, a joy to be with, an honor to be with.
And fifth, she introduces me to some of the many people she knows as "my boyfriend."
I hope that means her return date isn't anytime soon! :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)